The third time was not a charm for me. Three interviews, three rejections. All of these followed by "We loved you, but.." or "we really enjoyed your interview, but..". While my strengths, passion and energy have been appreciated, experience seems to be my weakness in this game. With each of these phone calls I have been crushed and my day ruined, but with each it gets a little easier and I try to think it's for the good. I thought it was great I didn't get the dream job far away because it meant I should stay here and maybe then I would get the local job. It was good I didn't get the local job because the staff in the interview made me very uncomfortable and it was in a school I found very disorganized. And now..well maybe it's good I didn't get this job because I belong at the other opening that just appeared in the district - one that I have experience for.
While I try to be positive..oh, how I try..I still fall down and beat myself up.
*If I'm talking to myself - I'm not good enough. For someone I love, for schools, to even get a call on so many applications I have put out there.
*If YOU ask me (on a good day), I am totally worth it! :) I am good at what I do and create such unique and personal relationships with my students that are really based on their growth as people and "good humans" as I call them. I know I have made a difference to their futures in the real world.
So where to go when it seems like there is only up but I keep finding new lows?
On the positive, I got a five-day work week this week for the first time in about a year! I am the only person in the world this excited to work five days! Hopefully that and my wedding cake fun keeps up. I have multiple offers by people who believe in me to start a business or take over a management opportunity. Problem - both of these are far down the line and could require financial supports.
Today, on my only day off this week, I get to go to Target! After four years it still makes me laugh that this is such a treat, but in my blog addiction, baking obsession and crafty mood it becomes more apparent each day how many things I don't have access to in this small town. However, I still live in paradise and it is one of the greatest gifts I have and I wouldn't trade it - besides, the drive is a nice break once in a while.
TODAY'S GIFTS!
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